Sweater: Zara thrifted, Striped top: forever 21, Necklace: Burlington Coat Factory, Boots: DSW, Purse: D&B
I know it has only been eleven days since I became a mom, but I'm already learning so so much!
I have to brag on my little boy a little and tell you how angelic he is.
He sleeps all the time.
The doctor told me not to let him go more than four hours without eating, so I have to wake him up once in the middle of the night, but I bet he would keep sleeping if I let him.
Ian and I just feel SO blessed to have such an easy baby so far... Praise the Lord!!!
Also, breast feeding has been way easier and less gross than I thought it was going to be. So that's great!
The only thing is that he hates being naked, so he pretty much always screams whenever we change him.
That all being said, parenthood is just not as hard as I thought it was going to be (at least at this point).
The hardest part by far-- and I'm about to get really personal here-- has been managing time with extended family.
Even before Greyer (pronounced gray-er btw) was born, our parents began asking how often they would see him since they are both about an hour and a half away. They asked how often I would go down there and when they could come up here... and frankly, I was/am feeling a tad overwhelmed by it all.
I am so so so blessed with a loving family that wants to be involved in my life, but I feel like I'm just failing everyone by needing time to get to know my boy on my own.
Everyone wants more time with him and it's only been a week and a half!
We've had SO many visitors since he's been born and I've never felt so loved and cared for.
But I guess I'm just tired and want some time getting to know my new little family of three. Just us.
It's hard to say no to love and attention, but I feel like it needs to be ok for me to do that without feeling like the bad guy or like what I'm giving is never enough.
Like I said, this is all stuff we've already talked with our family about and since we have the first/only grandchild in the state we are all learning how to balance our time together.
And c'mon, if this is the hardest part of parenthood it's really not that bad : )
We were in the same situation when I was pregnant with Number One. My entire family lived 2 hours south of us and we told them they could come up whenever they wanted but just give us a week's notice and we also went down once a month. Now we don't go down there at all because of money but my mom tries to come up every few weeks or so. Hopefully its easier for you guys than for us, but i'm sure you'll figure it out.
ReplyDeleteWhen I used to feel like the bad guy saying no, I just reminded myself that I was doing what was best for my family and the guilt subsided a little. Good luck.
girl- you are looking GREAT! and i can only imagine how loving (but suffocating) it must be during the first few weeks when everyone and their moms come to visit (im not a big fan of "lots of people" especially "lots of people fussing over me")..
ReplyDeletebut as you said, if THIS is the worst part, you've got it made sista.. just take a deep breath and relax (:
It is very hard managing your time & someone will always feel "left out" but you have to do what you want to do when you want! you'll find a good routine that works and will make everyone happy. If they can't see him as often as they want then they will be fine, after all he is YOUR son & you deserve every minute alone with him that you want. You look so amazing! I can't believe you just had a baby.
ReplyDeleteYou look so good friend! praying you have wisdom to figure all that out!
ReplyDeletexoxo
Totally! We had a bunch of visitors the first week after Zeek was born and then made the 2nd week solely for our little family - just the three of us. Skyler had taken two weeks off of work, so we wanted time to just spend together as our family. We said no to everyone - even our parents. It was a great decision for us and we're definitely doing something similar this time. It's hard to enjoy your new little bundle and hold and snuggle him when everyone and their mom is over and constantly wanting to hold him for you! I just wanted to enjoy Zeek's newborn stage MYSELF and not let it pass without me completely soaking it in. Because "newborn" stage does pass FAR too quickly. Enjoy your little man. :)
ReplyDeletepraying for you Sarah.
ReplyDeleteI obviously can not speak from experience, but we are facing these decisions already as family & friends all want to start booking tickets to come after baby arrives. I am so thankful to have a mama who told me very bluntly that it should be OUR time/home for the first 2-3 weeks. So we have pretty much said to everyone that the first 3 weeks we don't want visitors ((also because they would be staying with us for days upon days....& that is exhausting without a new baby)). No one has fussed much but I have gathered from the in-laws that they don't think this is necessary & that they had already planned to come the week the baby is due. I'm thankful that we were warned & we are sticking to our guns, but I can only imagine being back near family & friends & the constant battle of feeling guilty for not sharing baby with everyone else too.
i know you & ian will figure things our & i am so glad to hear that mr. greyer is such a good little sleeper. what a blessing.
XO.
& you look beautiful girl.
I think you're right on with that phrasing: "We need time to get to know our little boy, just the three of us." It allows you to stick up for your needs as a new mom and woman and shouldn't hurt anyone's feelings! Beautifully handled.
ReplyDeleteWhat a big and exciting week it must have been! You really look amazing for being a new/ first time mom! Enjoy your first few weeks.
It sounds like that can be super overwhelming, but look at it this way -- everyone just wants to share in your joy so much! You look amazing, by the way.
ReplyDeletexo Josie
I champion what everyone else said; make the decision to leave this time for your little family! Everyone rushes to see the baby because this stage is so short. No one is AS eaer to see a ten year old, right? That is because the baby phase is very short. My advice is to just be honest with everyone. Tell them how overwhelmed you are by the support and that you would really like to settle into your new life first. They'll be more understanding than you think! Congratulations on your sweet boy! He'll only get sweeter and your heart will become fuller than you ever could've imagined!
ReplyDeleteMy sister's baby used to scream when she had her nappy changed but now she's fine about it (if a little wriggly!). I think after about a month/six weeks or so she just got used to it and realised it wasn't such a trauma after all! So Greyer will be fine in a few weeks. Congratulations on his birth!
ReplyDeleteI've heard this a lot from new moms. Your feelings are totally valid and it's wise to set boundaries, especially in the beginning when you need lots of rest and minimizing extra stress is key. Enjoy your sweet boy-this is time you only get with him once!
ReplyDeleteI felt reallllly overwhelmed in the days after my son's birth. I had a handle on the "mom" thing, but all the family and friends stressed me out so bad! It was the LONG visits (I was tired!), and the extra bodies in our small apartment, and sue me- I was worried about germs. I didn't want anyone around but my mom and my husband...and I cried when my aunt showed up with my cousin and her kids...then hid in the bedroom. DON'T feel guilty for setting boundaries. This is new for you, and your small family deserves the chance to bond in private. Set up acceptable visiting hours, or just tell everyone to hold off a week or so. There will be PLENTY of time for everyone to dote on him n the days to come. (and that overwhelmed with visitors feeling totally fades) Congratulations!
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